Yesterday I ranted at my mastermind group.
I called them out on the fact that they keep trying to figure everything out for themselves instead of asking for my help. Me, the expert they are paying for expert advice! And then they don’t ask me for it!
Yes, I’ve done exactly this in the past myself.
Why is this a common thing because I and my clients are definitely not unique in this?
Shadows — like dysfunctional pride, shame for not being able to do it on your own, fear of being ridiculed by asking for help, thinking that if you don’t do it yourself the result isn’t valid, needing to prove yourself, wanting approval from your coach by proving you can do it on your own, and so many more reason — are what’s what.
All this is part of the Victim shadow pattern.
Successful people, on the other hand, access the Warrior power pattern and make sure they have plenty of help and support ALL. THE. TIME. They know the frustration and futileness of trying to do it all by themselves.
So I finally got smart and here’s how I do it these days:
I’m in contact with my mentor about everything, many times each day, six days a week. I want results, and I want them asap and that means I’m there all the time; when I get stuck with a shadow, when I’m not sure what to do, how to handle a certain situation, what to say next in a conversation, reviewing marketing posts…
In addition, I have colleagues and comrades in Shadow Alchemy who I exchange sessions with, averaging one per day.
My life matters.
That I want to live a Shadow free life matters.
That I want to gain energy mastery as soon as possible matters.
I’ll do whatever it takes, including getting loads of help with my shadows. Including stopping doing it all myself when I *know* I can’t see my own blind spots and it can happen so much faster when I have outside help.
I can’t see any good reason for making it take longer than absolutely necessary.